I happily hummed to myself as I strolled the aisles at Lowes, feeling giddy about some of those strapping prospects I spotted. Taking my time, I carefully selected my merchandise (stalked a particularly steamy customer), and headed for the check out. I was helped by a super friendly clerk who gave me a wide smile each time she made eye contact with me. Maybe, I supposed, she knew the real reason I was shopping at this fine establishment. I had a fleeting thought that I could really use a second job.
As I exited the store and pushed my shopping cart across the parking lot, I glanced down to make sure my potting soil was secure under the cart. That's when I noticed something was wrong. My potting soil was fine, but I was looking straight down at my ass! In all my strolling, my skirt had shifted more than 90 degrees around my waist. I twisted and pulled while trying to hold on to my cart with one hand, avoid being hit by a car, and stifle my nervous laughter.
Man, woman, young, old, member of the Jackson family, or not, wardrobe malfunctions will get you. So guys, don't judge us too harshly and we'll return the favor.