Sunday, December 16, 2007

"You are Gorgeous...I want to fuck you."


Is just really not a good idea for a first email.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

Rethink Your Own Information

Rereading information about your date before you meet is important. For some of us, rethinking our own information is important too.

"So you went to school in Baltimore, {Dauntless}?"

"Yeah, and I stayed in that area for a few years afterward."

"Oh yeah, where did you live?"

"Well, I lived in Towson, Timonium (a lie - with good reason - the truth, Cockeysville), and also, uhh... Holyshit! Whatthefuckwasthatplacecalled? Itwasjustthreeyearsago,moron "Um, White Marsh." That's not right!

"Oh, White Marsh? Where's that?"

Good question. "Just north of the city."

"Oh. Did you like it there?"

"Oh, yeah. It was great." Holy shit! Where did I live???

After the date, I walked through my front door, smacked my head with the palm of my hand and exclaimed to no one, "Owings Mills you moron!"